non-linear ambition

Friendships have been sustaining me these past several months as covid drags on and on and on….there have been many days that feel built upon hopes and then days followed by despair. when I speak to my friends’ things feel more clear.

On a zoom call from Stockholm, my friend and I were talking about ambition. how for me it is non-linear and not related to a traditional path of achievement. my ambitions fracture and divide and they build a density that is not always seen visibly.

maybe i am also is also this… since i can not know what the work will be, IF it will be, when it will be, i should just let it grow within, down and out, around and through. it doesn’t have to grow up and out forward and straight, it can curve and stunt... it can fracture, dissolve, disintegrate, die and build itself again.